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Chuckle of the Week

A husband, trying to prove to his wife that women talk more than men, showed her a study which indicated that men use on the average only 15,000 words a day, whereas women use 30,000 words a day.


She thought about this for awhile and then told her husband that women use twice as many words as men because they have to repeat everything they say.


And he replied, "What?"


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Husband/Wife Arrangement

On their wedding night, the young bride approached her new husband and asked for $20.00 for their first lovemaking encounter.  In his highly aroused state, her husband readily agreed.

This scenario was repeated each time they made love, for more than 30 years, with him thinking that it was a cute way for her to afford new clothes and other incidentals that she needed.

Arriving home around noon one day, she was surprised to find her husband in a very drunken state.  During the next few minutes, he explained that his employer was going through a process of corporate downsizing, and he had been let go.  It was unlikely that, at the age of 59, he'd be able to find another position that paid anywhere near what he'd been earning, and therefore, they were financially ruined.

Calmly, his wife handed him a bank book which showed more than thirty years of steady deposits and interest totaling nearly $1 million.  Then she showed him certificates of deposit issued by the bank which were worth over $2 million, and informed him that they were one of the largest depositors in the bank.  She explained that for the more than three decades she had "charged" him for sex, these holdings had multiplied and these were the results of her savings and investments.

Faced with evidence of cash and investments worth over $3 million, her husband was so astounded he could barely speak, but finally he found his voice and blurted out, "If I'd had any idea what you were doing, I would have given you all my business!"

That's when she shot him.

You know, sometimes, men just don't know when to keep their mouths shut.



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