HARVARD SQUARE COMMENTARY

June 25, 2007
From Sanitas

A Lexicon for the 21st Century

John Turner


Awareness: Believing something a propagandist wants you to be believe.

Axis Mundi: A pole that runs from the heavens to the nether regions right through where you're standing.

Ayatollah: A guy deeply in need of Pepto-Bismol.

Baby: A small person with the magical ability to counter all evidence of human depravity.

Bacchus: A guy who likes to frolic with wood nymphs--as who wouldn't?

Backgammon: A board game to which characters in novels repair after they have been insulted in conversation.

Backlash: A slackening of idiocy.

Bakhtin: A theorist young academic critics must quote to show they are in the flow of things; readers of their works must wade three pages beyond this obligatory citation to see if there is any chance for intelligence to overtake pedantry.

Balanced: Quality of an account that's agreeably slanted.

Ball: Sphere watched intently by senators in order to do the nation's business.

Ballet: Theatrical performance no husband has ever willingly attended.

Baluchithere: A large, ugly animal, now, thankfully, extinct, which shows that the judgment of fanatical environmentalists is not always to be trusted.

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