July 21, 2008
Chuckle of the Week


Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. - Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

This is how it manifests:
  • I decide to water my garden.
  • As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide it needs washing.
  • As I start toward the garage, I notice mail on the porch table that I brought up from the mail box earlier.
  • I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.
  • I lay my car keys on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table, and notice that the can is full.
  • So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first.
  • But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first.
  • I take my check book off the table, and see that there is only one check left.
  • My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Coke I'd been drinking.
  • The Coke is getting warm, so I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.
  • As I head toward the kitchen with the Coke, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye-they need water.
  • I put the Coke on the counter and discover my reading glasses that I've been searching for all morning.
  • I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going to water the flowers.
  • I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote.
  • Someone left it on the kitchen table.
  • I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I'll be looking for the remote, but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers.
  • I pour some water in the flowers, but also spill some on the floor.
  • So, I set the remote back on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill.
  • Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day:
  • the car isn't washed
  • the bills aren't paid
  • there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter
  • the flowers don't have enough water,
  • there is still only 1 check in my check book,
  • I can't find the remote,
  • I can't find my glasses, and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.

Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today. I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all damn day, and I'm really tired. I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail....

Thank goodness there's a name for this disorder. Somehow I feel better, even though I have it!!


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